fear of man.

fear is something i've constantly struggled with. peace is something that Jesus Christ, the Prince of Peace has constantly given me. a peace that surpasses all understanding.

fear [feer] noun -
a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid.

whether the threat is real or imagined.

in my case, there is no reason to fear. my chains are gone, i've been set free, my God, my Savior has ransomed me.

isaiah 41:10 . . . so do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you;
I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

genesis 23:23 . . . fear not, for I am with thee, and will bless thee.

psalm 23:4 . . . even though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
i will fear no evil, for You are with me;
Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

deuteronomy 1:21 . . . do not fear or be dismayed.

i face situations daily. in interactions with fellow believers. in conversations with my husband. in my thoughts. in my heart. even as i pray. i'm confronted my fear. i'm challenged. i'm tempted to be dishonest. i fall constantly into untrust. i lack faith.

Christ is real to me. His love. His saving grace. He has pulled me out if the pit, in all senses. He has saved me from ending my own life. He has loosed my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness. He has replaced my mourning with dancing.

there's so many things i don't do or say because fear inhibits me. i stop myself from sharing scripture. i stop myself from speaking truth. i convince myself of things that are untrue.

though most of my life i've (in joining the "unique" bandwagon) i've tried to go against the grain. but it's all distorted, fallacious. where i will face trial or judgment, i'm like a fish. i may be swimming upstream, but so are all the other fish around me.

there are so many around me who will judge all things Christ proclaiming. Anyone who openly proclaims Christ is the object of scrutiny in so many of my circles. even "Christian" circles. for this reason i've withheld my heart. as the Lord has challenged me to openly encourage others, i've refused.

it hit me again today how much my fear of man influences my ability to share the gospel. not only share the gospel, but live it. anna bailey tweeted this morning a quote from priscilla shirer: "we must remember that sharing Jesus is supposed to be a way we live, not just something we do." i easily forget this. and i easily dismiss my calling to be a witness.

i have SEEN, i have heard. it took a long while, but the lyrics to brooke fraser's , "Albertine" finally registered.

"now that i have seen, i am responsible."

God's work in my life is obvious to me. It's probably obvious to other too. That's how my God works. He isn't subtle. He's large.

i pray for my fear of man to disintegrate. i pray only for the fear of the Lord. my Awesome God whose Word never fails, whose peace surpasses all understanding, whose power spoke all things into being, He alone is worth fearing.

i pray that i will proclaim the truth of Jesus Christ more. that i will speak with boldness. that i will testify to the grace He has placed on my life. to the mercy He showed in sparing me.

thank you to all of you who pin verses. to all of you whose facebook statuses show of the joy overflowing in your heart for the gospel. to those of you who tweet, over and over, TRUTH. continue it. despite any criticism. continue it. but also, LIVE IT. SPEAK IT. be bold. you're all in my prayers, and i'm encouraged my your hearts to see the message of Jesus Christ alive in our generation.